444 notes • 11 months ago •

wasabiflux:

Oh my god.

Luckily, we’ve discovered a delightfully new way to become awake and alert without the unpleasantness of artificial electronic buzzing. Stephen Fry, the wonderfully dry and proper Englishman, reprising his role as “Jeeves,” a gentleman’s gentleman. Do not call him a butler, though he can, of course, buttle with the best of them.

…

Here are some examples of Jeeve’s warm voice as he announces the breaking of the dawn, and the urgency of your need for wakefulness.

• It appears to be morning. Very inconvenient, I agree. I believe it is the rotation of the Earth that is to blame, Sir.
• I am delighted that you have survived another night.
• I’m afraid the staff has absconded, Sir, and it is my day off. I trust it would not be too onerous, Sir, to make your own exquisitely sliced toast and perfectly cooked breakfast?
• Let us seize the day and take it roughly from behind, as the Colonel used to say in his unfortunate way.
• Your horoscope is promising very considerable profit and equal quantities of pleasure. The world merely requires your presence for the process to begin.
• The world has been very anxious to hear from you for the last eight hours. Shall I inform the news agencies you’re about to rise, Sir?
• The rising and the shining cannot be postponed indefinitely. Though shining is not compulsory in this intractable world, the rising eventually is.
• I feel sure you have slept soundly, feel thoroughly refreshed, and await the day with the anticipation of an energetic gazelle.
• It is time to face the day. Shall I cancel your appointments and book a hotel for a month in Seychelles? Very good Sir.

OH MY GOD. NEED THIS NOW.

(via noteveninshakespeare)

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    But I’m not a sir. I can’t have this…

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    I HAVE A MIGHTY NEEEEEEED

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    voiced by stephen fry stephen fry

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    Lou! I found a new clock for you!

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    DON’T KNOW WHY THERE’S A PRICE-TAG ON THIS. IT’S PRICELESS TO ME.

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